Reading John 20: 24-29
Many of us can identify with St. Thomas as the patron Saint of Doubt. We are constantly bombarded with situations where we have to decide to believe or disbelieve, to trust or distrust, facts or fiction, and so on and so forth. Yet over time the decisions we make mold us into becoming who we are today. When the disciples break the good news that Jesus is alive, Thomas is very clear about his terms of faith in the resurrection. Unless he sees and touches the scars on Jesus’ hands and side, he remains steadfast in his disbelief of the testimony of the disciples (John 20:24-25). We wonder where Thomas was when Jesus appeared to the disciples. Did Thomas stay away from the fellowship of the disciples because he is so brokenhearted from the betrayal, arrest, duplicitous trial and brutal death of Jesus?
There are two notable incidents in the gospel of John where we see Thomas speaking passionately to Jesus and the disciples. The first time is when Jesus is called urgently to come to Judea to heal the dying Lazarus, however the Jews were all set to stone him if they crossed paths. Thomas, filled with love and loyalty to Jesus, courageously says he would go with Jesus to his death (John 11:7-16). The second time is at the last supper when Jesus reveals he is going away soon to the father saying, “You know the way to where I am going” (John 14:4-7). On hearing this revelation Thomas says, “Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?” The impatient despair in Thomas’s frank question to Jesus is clear evidence that he doesn’t really understand who Jesus was or what he meant by this departing dialogue.
Is Thomas so brokenhearted that he just can’t get past the grief and doubts that overwhelm him? Or is it that he desperately longs to have the same personal experience that the other disciples had with the Lord? It is amazing that even after being with Jesus at the raising of Lazarus from the dead, he just does not understand that with God all things are possible (Matthew 19:26).
A week later Jesus comes back to visit his disciples and this time Thomas is with them. Jesus knows Thomas has doubts so he asks Thomas to touch and see that all his conditions for belief are met. Looking at Jesus with awe and reverence all he can say is, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus says to Thomas,”You believe because you have seen with your own eyes. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe” (John 20:26-29). Jesus says we are blessed if we can believe in his resurrection without having seen him like his disciples.The gospel message that Jesus is the Christ, the son of the living God by whom we all receive eternal life can be found in the Bible. The sermons and parables of Jesus, along with the testimony, epistles and acts of the apostles are all we need to believe. Above all practicing the two commandments that are fundamental to our faith and witness as Christians is our love for God and our neighbor.
Don’t we all have our share of doubts and need for personal experiences? We have our own threshold for when we are willing to believe anyone or anything. Isn’t the opposite of doubt, faith? St. Anselm of Canterbury of the eleventh century is famous for his quote, “faith seeking understanding” (fides quaerens intellectum). What he means by that often misunderstood quote is, “an active love for God seeking a deeper knowledge of God.” To build our faith in Jesus, we have to first accept that God loves us and we in turn love him too. Just as St. Anselm’s love drove him to a deeper knowledge, we should use this as a model to grow our faith through this mutual bond of love with the Lord. As we face trials and tests in our lives that cause us to doubt, we learn to grow in faith by the confidence (hope) that God loves us and wants the best for us in our life. St. Paul says that to build our faith without love is really nothing of any value (1 Corinthians 13:2).
In the psalms we see that the Psalmists never question whether God exists but they lament crying out to God why they have been abandoned or their enemies have dominion over them. It is amusing that in St. Anselm’s book, Proslogion, he writes about the “Fool” who has said in his heart, “There is no God” (like the psalmist says Psalm 14:1). In this meditation he strives to reach the Christians who seek a rational basis for their faith in God. St. Anselm’s conclusion with so much of reverence and awe is, “A being than which none greater can be conceived must exist, and we call this being God.”
St. Paul says that God decides the measure of faith each one receives (Romans 12:3). For some faith is a God given gift. A key to faith is to humbly understand our identity in Christ. We judge ourselves conscientiously based on how God sees us and not as the world does. To some doubt is a normal phase in their spiritual lives, there is no need to be alarmed by those thoughts and feelings. Michael Faraday the brilliant scientist who grew up in a good Christian home, became a believer much later in his life. He was a faithful member of a church from boyhood but passed through a sea of doubts until one day he came to humbly witness the reality of Christ in his life. It was his perseverance to seek God through his fellowship with other believers and share in their faith experiences that leads him to finally become a believer (Luke 11:5-12). When brilliant scientists like Faraday doubt yet still believe it gives us hope.
C. S. Lewis in his book “ Grief Observed ” writes about the pain of losing his wife when he doubted the goodness and fairness of God. He says, “My idea of God is not a divine idea. It has to be shattered from time to time. He shatters it himself. He is the great iconoclast. Could we not almost say that this shattering is one of the marks of his presence?” When spiritual giants like Lewis doubt yet still believe, it gives us hope. To Lewis, faith comes to us as a gift, the grace of the comforting presence of God reaching out and touching our shattered lives, when we confront significant downturns like death, disease, alcoholism, drug addiction, abuse, bankruptcy etc. Like the potter shapes and reshapes each piece to his delight, so God shapes us into masterpieces with his skill and creativity (Ephesians 2:10).
Jesus said to to Thomas,”You believe because you have seen with your own eyes. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe” (John 20:26-29). How do we believe in an invisible God? It is by being joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer (Romans 12:12). St Paul urges us to offer our lives as a living sacrifice to God and use our gifts to serve one another in love (Romans 12:1-2, 6-8). We are bound to face trials and turbulences in our lives. Can we climb half way up a mountain and then give up? If we do reach heights that seem unscalable in life, with the help of the Holy Spirit we persist in prayer like the parable of the persistent widow until we find our way again (Luke 18:1-8). There will be times we lament with all our heart to God like the Psalmist until we are comforted by the presence of God in our lives (Psalm 55:17). The important act of faith is to pray fervently and not let our problems and pain fester within us. When we articulate our doubts to a caring prayer fellowship group it helps to clean up the toxicity in our lives. The path to spiritual maturity is through childlike humility of learning to trust in the path God has carved out for us to walk through (Matthew 18:1-4). A critical step in prayer is when we surrender our doubts to a loving God and ask him to help us understand with the help of the Holy Spirit enlightening us with God’s Word. We stand on the promises that God the author and perfecter of our faith will mold us to be perfect one day. (Hebrews 12:2; Romans 8:29-30; Philippians 1:6).
Prayer: - Lord Jesus, your living presence in the lives of Thomas and the other disciples drew them with chords of love to believe in your resurrection. Oh Lord shine in our hearts the light of your glory that we may grow in faith, hope and love to believe in you as our Savior and Lord. Amen
Soli Deo Gloria
9 comments:
Surely, while we teach that faith ought to be certain and assured, we cannot imagine any certainty that is not tinged with doubt, or any assurance that is not assailed by some anxiety.
We’ve all experienced this, me too. It is part of the journey of faith, it is part of our lives. This should not surprise us, because we are human beings, marked by fragility and limitations. We are all weak, we all have limits: do not panic. We all have them
I remembered something Father Tom had told me—that the opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns
A man may be haunted with doubts and only grow thereby in faith. Doubts are the messengers of the Living One to the honest. They are the first knock at our door of things that are not yet, but have to be, understood.
If faith is lacking, it is because there is too much selfishness, too much concern for personal gain. For faith to be true, it has to be generous and loving. Love and faith go together, they complete each other.
Mother Teresa
Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
Man's mind is so formed that it is far more susceptible to falsehood than to truth.
Desiderius Erasmus
John20:29. because you have seen me, you have believed--words of measured encouragement (commendation}, but of indirect and doubtless painfully--felt disapproval (rebuke): that is, it is only on the evidence of your senses, and after promptly (peremptorily) refusing all evidence short of that.'
blessed they that have not seen, and yet have believed--"Wonderful indeed and rich in blessing for us who have not seen Him, is this closing word of the Gospel" [ALFORD].
John 20:30, 31. FIRST CLOSE OF THIS GOSPEL.
The connection of these verses with the last words of John 20:29 is beautiful: that is, And indeed, as the Lord pronounced them blessed who not having seen Him have yet believed, so for that one end have the whole contents of this Gospel been recorded, that all who read it may believe on Him, and believing, have life in that blessed name.
The Purpose of John’s Gospel (NIV )
30 Jesus performed many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. 31 But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name.
John 20:30-31
30. many other signs--miracles.
31. But these are written--as sufficient specimens.
the Christ, the Son of God--the one His official, the other His personal, title.
believing . . . may have life-- eternal life
Jamieson, Faussett, and Brown
St. Thomas was the first and perhaps the only person who wanted to have scientific proof of Yeshua's Resurrection! Proof by way of physical presence of Yeshua, despite the averments of his brother Apostles. He would accept and believe Yeshua's Resurrection only if he could firstly see the physical presence of Yeshua. He wanted to confirm the physical presence by touching Yeshua's hands, feeling the nail wounds by passing his fingers through the nail scars. Totally scientific.
Yeshua now came a second time to offer the proofs St. Thomas looked for. St. Thomas was stunned. The impossible was now made possible! A physical Resurrection did take place. St. Thomas 's three year journey with his Master wasn't sufficient to instill belief. He just broke down and fell on his knees and cried out 'My Lord and my God!'
You could see me. Feel me to verify my physical presence. But what about those who have to believe without seeing or feeling? This is the crucial question every Christian asks himself! Was it really so? It's here that another sense, apart from physical touch and feel, takes over. The sense of personal experience.
A deduction from putting two and two together from our personal experience with Yeshua comes. Starting from childhood experiences, being hand held and nurtured by Yeshua through our difficult times, such that we gain fullest confidence in our God and just pray and leave the result to Yeshua's Will, and everytime it is more than what we thought we wanted. It's a companionship we develop with Yeshua and always praying that we wouldn't ever have the same kind of doubts experienced by St. Thomas though it yielded excellent results for St. Thomas!
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